Cancer, you have taken much from me. In return you have given me myself as I could never have seen without you. For myself I can stand to forgive you. For all you are punishing to show me the truth I struggle. Their forgiveness is theirs and will come with time. Mine is frozen and locked. You have taken my future and that is ok. But you have also taken my future with them and I can not allow this. Of course I can do nothing it seems. So I sit here and stew, write blogs and cry and slide ever closer to death.