I am very tired. I sleep about 12 hours a day but I am still tired. My pain is down, then it is up again. I an struggling to get a grip on the situation. Things look good, but I … Continue reading
“in the end she died so quickly that she left everything behind and was free”. My poor recollection of the words of a dancer about the death of Pina Bausch in the movie “Pina”. Those words got me. I cried … Continue reading
Thank you to all who have read and commented on posts. I have read and loved every one. If you havn’t commended no problem. Thank you always for reading. I write for myself but it is comforting to know that … Continue reading
I sit in the changing room at the hospital. Nameless blue gown barely pretending to cover me, head in my hands, tears running down my cheeks. I cry for so many things that I could never describe them all. I … Continue reading
I can not describe or understand how I can be so angry and yet not at the same time. I think of climbing, my friends, my children (clearly the idea, not the reality,) and suddenly I am so angry I … Continue reading
Wake, eat, radiation, sleep, eat, sleep, move, take pills, recover, eat, watch tv, sleep. And again. And again. I tire of this. I tire of that. Yet sleep is already dominant.