Had a bit of a panic attack tomorrow. Did some work around the house. Because of the breathing difficulties I get out of breath very fast. Sat down, and had real trouble catching my breath. Suddenly panic took over, not … Continue reading
Breathing has got worse fast. Five days ago it was on my mind but quite easy. Now I am wheezing and struggling to get enough air. Also feel like my anus is on fire, hence the 430 blog post. Having … Continue reading
I still think that I could survive. Sometimes more than others but I certainly think there is some hope. Nothing really of substance to write but I feel that often the times of hope get lost because they are not … Continue reading
Wake, pill, relief, couch, book, tv, food, enema, fear, shower, fear, couch, book, tv, pill, relief, bed, hate, sleep, repeat. I am amazed at my level of health considering the progression out disease. I am convinced that the best thing … Continue reading
I look back to two showers in late 2008. Struggling with my life direction a shower is an escape. A cleansing and pure experience. In the first I glance down and think to myself “my lymph nodes are up”. I … Continue reading
Its amazing what brings it all home. I just opened the door and the day is cool and fresh. I thought of all the days like this that I have gone climbing with good friends and I got really sad. … Continue reading
I have two lumps on my left testicle. Enough.